Forgiving Oneself

Last week I had an unwelcome surprise. While walking my dog, I slipped and broke my ankle. At the onset, while I was in a good amount of pain, I also spend a fair amount of time, internally scolding myself for my foolishness.

Looking back, I see that I may have experienced twice as much "pain", more than I really needed. My "slip slide" on the pavement was a mistake, not by intention. Sometimes we let our guard down and things just happen.

The ankle is healing, and I am hobbling along. From this experience, I know I will again be more wary of the puddles in my path and the way I treat myself when I make a mistake.

Transitioning to Having Children

One of life's biggest transitions is going from being without a child to having one. Having a child changes many things:

1) No longer is there just "you" to plan for. You have another life to care for and cherish.

2) Having a child often makes you more aware of your mortality.

3) Having a child changes some of your perspectives, outlook and choices

4) No matter how old your child becomes, they are still your child in your heart.


Enjoy parenthood. Realize and accept there will be many challenges and changes in your life.

900 Days at Sea

Do you ever feel you are adrift in the ocean of your life? Sometimes when we get lulled in the complacency of everyday waves of life we lose sight of where we are headed. We are usually most often adrift when we are out of touch with who we are and where we are going.

Going out drifting can be unwise if we do not have a map or a chart. Sure, we can enjoy a few days of "just being" but if we venture into waters unknown we can be pushed upon the rocks and shoals of life.

To get redirected and back on course, we need to stop and take careful inventory. The four questions we need to begin asking is:

Who are we?

What have we to give?

Where shall we spend our days upon this planet?

Who would be good and interesting passengers on our boat of life?

For the last 900 days, a sailor has been on an ocean voyage without resupplying or stopping.The original destination day 1000 - However the planned return to New York harbor in April of 2010 may be extended a few more weeks or months due to winter weather. It has been fun being a visitor to the 1000 day at sea blog and tracking this unique and interesting journey.

If you like to read and want to take another sea journey you can read the classic book Sailing Alone Around the World by Joshua Slocum.

Revisiting The Challenge of Change

Change is hard, change is never easy. The only thing constant of course is CHANGE.

Charles Kettering who was an American electrical engineer and manufacturer in the late 1900's said "The world hates change, yet it is the only thing that has brought progress".

Goethe, the German poet and dramatist said "Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for change".

Given the insight of the ages, it is helpful to understand the steps involved in change. First step is problem recognition. Sometimes problems just arrive and hit us on the head. Other times, a nagging feeling gives us a sense of things to come.

The second thing to do when examining change is to identify the causes. What exactly caused this? Sometimes the cause is simple, other times a complex series of events created the change. The third step is going through the change. Change, when possible, is most often most comfortable when we implement it ourselves. Often case this is not what happens. Change happens then we change. Finally we need to evaluate the changes we have undertaken.

Change is a laboratory for self and organizational growth. Although we may fear it, it is best to embrace it and learn from it. Change is hard, change takes work but in the end we grow.

I originally wrote this article in the late 1990's and then posted this article on my Transition Your Life blog in October of 2007. Somethings are worth revisiting and contemplating for new lessons, insights and thoughts.

Transitions Through Your Life

Over the last few months, I been describing stages in the adult life. Here is a recap of the stages and links to the posts.


Transition Your Life - Adulthood
Transition Your Life - Early Adulthood
Transition Your Life - Middle Age
Transition Your Life - Golden Age
Transition Your Life - Senior Age
Transition Your Life - Elderhood

Stillness and Silence

We are always surrounded by noise. Even the quietest of spaces have noises. To quiet our minds we sometimes need to quiet our space. To begin the quiet process we need to sit still and just be.

While you are reading this on the screen you are likely hearing the hum of your computer's fan or having the din of some music you may be playing in the background. Perhaps you are wiggling on your chair, or handling some of the objects around your desk.

Try an exercise of stillness. It is unlikely to be easy, it is unlikely to be pure silence, but you may be able to do half of this exercise.

Silence and stillness usually bring us the freedom to begin inner retrospection.

You could try listening to a short nature sound the same one every day, for a week to see if it relaxes your mind and opens you up to new possibilities.

Here are a couple of suggestions:

Transition Your Life - Elderhood

This is the sixth and final in the series of posts on transition times. Let's visit the transition periods that often occur in Elder years (age 80 - 100+).

Transitioning to patriarch or matriarch of family
Transitioning to a retirement or assisted living community
Transitioning to having help or occasional assistance
Transitioning to grandchildren and great-grandchildren
Transitioning to loss of loved one and friends
Transitioning to evolving spiritual or religious beliefs
Transitioning to a new or chronic health condition
Transitioning to physical restrictions and limitations
Transitioning to changing relationships with your children (adult to elderly parent)
Transitioning to family historian
Transitioning to simpler lifestyle
Transitioning to fewer hobbies and interests


See also
Transition Your Life - Adulthood
Transition Your Life - Early Adulthood
Transition Your Life - Middle Age
Transition Your Life - Golden Age
Transition Your Life - Senior Age